A few days after we started the Oasis project, I printed this out for my husband.
I needed for him to read this part especially:
Not a bit of that was a surprise for him.
I think the reason I find such comfort in understanding my personality type is that I struggle with feeling like I am defective. (Heads-up: transparency happening.) As much as I have grown into my skin, grown into who I was created to be as my 30s have unfolded, I still can't shake a perpetual belief that deep, deep down, I am broken.
And so when I read assessments that pretty much perfectly describe how I function in this world, I can't help but to feel better. It's not just me.
People with my personality type tend to live by a strict internal code. When my outward actions don't match my inward idealistic standards, I am miserable. And yet, because of that big old P at the end of my type, I am prone to just thinking about how I am unable to do what I know I need to do instead of acting on what I need to do.
I truly do feel like I need a warning label:
WARNING: The person you are meeting, speaking to, reading, or emailing is most often experienced by others as flaky.
She operates in the world of The Big Picture, and therefore details often fall off of her radar screen.
She will most likely:
1) Read your email and need to think on a response. She will then forget to email you the response, even though she has spent a good deal of time thinking about it.
2) Hear your prayer concern and feel a great deal of empathy for you and your situation. She will probably think about you for days, praying for you often as you come to mind. She will, however, neglect to tell you this.
3) Recognize that you are going through a difficult time and think of no less than a dozen elaborate and thoughtful ways to minister to you in your need. She will probably act on none of these ideas, even though she has given them all a great deal of thought.
4) Be your biggest supporter and cheerleader at the beginning of a project. Her enthusiasm will eventually fizzle. She is distracted easily by shiny things. Going the distance is not her strong suit.
5) Agree to read and review your newest book or project. Weeks will pass before a review is finally published. This does not mean that she did not love your project; on the contrary, she probably loved it so much that she feels her review of your work must be absolutely perfect before she can publish it. She is often crushed by the weight of her own standards which propels her directly into inaction accompanied by guilt.
6) Interrupt you. Her mind is constantly making connections, often at a speed which outpaces human speech and good manners.
7) Astound you with her incredible clumsiness. This may or may not be related to her personality type, but you should have fair warning nonetheless.
8) Start a multitude of projects and finish few.
9) Not take criticism well. She is keenly aware of her shortcomings and imperfections, always hyper-aware of the ways her outward actions don't meet her inner standards. When those imperfections are recognized by others, it can be crippling.
10) Personify capriciousness, fickleness, moodiness, and procrastination. She is also prone to being driven by her feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings.
If you have the great misfortune of partnering with her on a project or serving as her editor, please know that she will accomplish absolutely nothing without a deadline. Be assured, however, that she rarely misses deadlines altogether as she is capable of intense micro-focus and dedicated energy as a deadline approaches.
Finally, if you are counting on her to take an action of some sort, she will probably disappoint you. And even if you aren't actually disappointed with her, she probably thinks that you are.
Do you think I could have that printed up on business cards to hand to people I meet?
This is all very true about me, but I'm not telling you to garner any sympathy or to have you respond with warm fuzzies. In fact, I'm closing comments on this. And I'm not sobbing at the keyboard as I write, either. In fact, I amused myself quite a bit as I thought of all of the ways people should be warned about me.
These are just some things I thought you should know. Tomorrow, I'll be sharing with you the other side of the shiny coin that is moi.
(Ohhhhhhh, shiny . . . )
