SortaCrunchy

this is how ... we met

Our sorority house was actually a section of a dorm, and the freshman lived on the top floor and we tended to travel in packs. As such, I didn't know the upperclassmen all that well and I figured they couldn't possibly know me very well, either. So I was a little taken aback, you see, when one of them came bounding through our living room/lounge one bright and cold January day and said in passing, "I know this guy you should meet! You two have so much in common!"

The beautiful and talented Leigh Kramer asked me to be part of her This Is How We Met series running this month. I traced the story of my marriage to Kyle all the way back to the beginning. You can read the rest at her place (and go ahead and lose yourself in the stories of others while you are there!).

this is where . . . i wash the dishes

If you'll recall, my parents had four kids in the span of six year. Some of my earliest memories include my dad doing the dishes every night after dinner. I like to think my parents were trailblazing pioneers in the movement toward equal division of household chores, but I bet if you asked them about that, they would probably say it was because my mother had already crawled off to bed. I can't blame her.

My dad would sing At The Cross and O, Victory in Jesus and Johnny Horton's Battle of New Orleans (that was his favorite) while we stood at his side, begging him to hurry so he could take us outside to play.

Not that mother never did the dishes. In fact, when she was upset or sad or angry, she would take it out on the dirty dishes, plunging her hands past the delicate suds into the murkey water beneath. Drinking glasses would rattle and dishes would clatter and the four of us would scatter like rats.

7 Quick Takes: Been A Long Time Edition

We had two more snow days this week, and I am using today to tie up the loose ends. 

Wishing/dreaming/hoping/praying that this was the last of the snow and we can charge full steam into Normal Life now.  So while a sky full of sun melts of snow outside my window, how about some 7 Quick Takes?  Haven't done these in a while . . .

1. I've known for a long time that when I am hormonal, I should ban myself from the computer.  The things I say/write/do always make me cringe when everything levels out again.  A perfect example of this is the snow grinch post.  Gah.  How embarrassing.  Oh, waaaah.  I have heat, electricity, Netflix, Dish, food, and a beautiful family to cuddle for days on end.  Poor me. 

Meanwhile there are children who depend on school to receive two meals a day who may or may NOT have eaten while we've been out of school for snow.  There are houses that have little or no heat, people who lost days of work and therefore lost income while everything was shut down, I mean, just real real things to complain about.  I'm so spoiled.  I hate that I wrote that.  forgive?

2. Do you think you could narrow down your personal possessions to just 100 Things?  I saw The 100 Thing Challenge: How I Got Rid of Almost Everything, Remade My Life, and Regained My Soul in Steady Mom's sidebar, and I have to admit, I am intrigued by the idea.  Hmmmmm.

3. The best book I didn't tell you about last year is Jonathan Merritt's Green Like God: Unlocking the Divine Plan for Our Planet.  Absolutely fantastic read.  Over at not one sparrow, you can read a very brief excerpt from it on the topic of factory farming.  I really need to write up my thoughts on that book.

4. Okay, so speaking of books.  I realized after I published this yesterday that there are, in fact, a few more KEEPER books floating around here.

For example, I stashed these on a shelf in our "art studio" (officially located in one corner of the laundry room):

Also, my copy of Radical is around here somewhere, as is When Helping Hurts. I am pretty sure I've loaned out my copy of Interrupted, but I'm puzzled as to what I've done with Evolving in Monkey Town. I KNOW I didn't purge that one. Did I lend it to you?

Anyway.  It was just bothering me that I had said, okay, I've cut it down to two shelves of books, but obviously that isn't entirely true.  Mostly true, though.  That counts.

5. I love music, but I do have a tendency to get stuck in musical ruts.  I listened to Patty Griffin pretty much exclusively for two years because I couldn't fathom there was anything else out there.  Pandora has helped me to become more adventurous, but even then I'll get stuck on one station and play it for months on end.  (If you'll recall, it's been Forest Sun for months and months.)

So, earlier this week, Boo Mama linked to this video for Fire and Dynamite from Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors and INSTANT OBSESSION.  I've played it/listened to it so much this week that it was actually sorta in the soundtrack for a dream one night.  That's weird. I know.  So I promptly made a Drew Holcomb Pandora station, and I gotta say: giving ol' Forest a run for his money.

6. I have to brag on my three year old for a second.  We are in some BIG TIME half-age angst, but every now and again we have a little moment of our sweetheart Aliza, and it's blissful.  This morning, I was helping PTO at Dacey's school get Valentine gifts ready, and I thought we would be there for maybe an hour.  It turned into two-and-a-half hours, and she was just GOLDEN.  Didn't complain, didn't get into things, didn't meltdown over anything; in fact, she was a pretty good little helper. 

I love those little glimpses of who she really is when things aren't feeling all unsettled on the inside.

7. Fifteen years ago this weekend, I took a boy whom I had only been on one date with to a sorority party.  The theme was handcuffs, which just speaks to you of class and elegance and charm, doesn't it?

I think I cuffed him pretty good:

He hasn't been able to shake loose of me since.

You can read more 7 Quick Takes over at Conversion Diary!

 

 

Is Nothing Sacred? Finding Oasis in a New Bible

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned before that I've had the same Bible since I was a sophomore in high school.  So, like, eighteen years. Or whatever.

Look at it, won't you?  Note the dusty rose/mauve Bible cover.  That's clearly not of this decade.  It's not even of this century.  It's solid early 90's Christian Culture Chic.  Through the years, the Bible cover and the Bible's covers have grown attached to each other.  Literally.  It's quite unhealthy.  Co-dependent, I think.

Kyle bought me a new Bible for Christmas.  And, to be honest, I was offended.

I didn't ask for a new Bible.

I didn't want a new Bible.

He had the audacity to suggest that I needed a new Bible.  I think he might have said my old Bible was "embarrassing."  I did not "take that well."

What if you're called on to read from the first chapter of Genesis?

Well. 

Okay.  So the first three chapters of Genesis are all torn out and in disarray.  I don't know when that happened (possibly around the time Dacey was a toddler and possibly when we were learning that Toddlers Destroy Things).

But, you know, those first three chapters of Genesis . . . they cause so much division.  So much rancor.  So much disagreement.  Maybe it's sort of symbolic that I can't read to you from the first three chapter of Genesis.  Maybe?

But what I needed for him to understand is that my old Bible was much more than, you know, God's Holy Word spoken to us.  It was a record of days for me.

I still remember exactly where I was when I first stumbled on Ephesians 3.  I remember taking my ink pen and underlining and starring it.  I was a senior in high school.  I needed to know how high and long and wide and deep is the love of Christ.  I needed to know that the God who loves me can do things I can't even dream up in my wildest dreams.

Consider, if you will, the book of Daniel.  Does your book of Daniel look like this?  Possibly.  (If you've taken Beth Moore's class on Daniel.)  (Like I have.) (Twice.)

One of my favorite pages from my old Bible.  On the morning of January 27th, 2005, I was nine days passed my due date with Dacey.  We were to wake up early, call the L&D floor at the hospital, and if there was room, I could come in for an induction.

And alas, there was no room.  And once again, I had to wait on the LORD:

(but I did go into labor later that day.  God's timing.  You just never know about these things.)

Page after page is marked up, circled, starred, noted . . . I can hardly read a passage without taking a tumble down Memory Lane.

But it gets better.  Oh, yes.

In the back, there are scads of old church bulletins and notes and random pieces of paper, some carefully tucked away, some thoughtlessly shoved in for no apparent reason at all.

Here's this one from when we lived in Fort Worth, years and years ago, years before we started our family, those years I spent as a Coach's Wife, the one who sat alone in church.

I entertained myself with baby names:

And this one?  Oh, this is just one long note passed between bestie Jaime and I circa 1993.  Maybe 1994.  Righteous, upstanding young women that we were, we should have been taking sermon notes.

But we were sixteen-ish, and our thoughts rose far above the church pews and stained glass and swirled with dreams of leaving home and college and career and and and . . .

I put a heavy blur down on that one to protect the innocent, of course.  Jaime and I were nothing if not innocent.  *snort*

I keep that one because it makes me cringe and laugh and remember who I was when that Bible was crisp and new, when my faith was taking baby steps, when I knew nothing of the bruised knees and forehead bumps that my beliefs would endure in the years to come.

And so.

My husband, the one who loves clean lines and no clutter, the one who doesn't write in his Bibles, the one who is responsible with church bulletins, he bought me a new Bible for Christmas:

And there is Genesis, all intact and complete (and still controversial).

And there's Ephesians, pristine and glittering with the same promises:

And there's Daniel, all maps and puzzles and knots to be untangled and words that find fulfillment in Revelation:

And a very sterile Psalm.  Still offering the same assurance of God's goodness while we wait.  It looks naive and untested, all untouched like that.  Doesn't it?

It's a little sad, you know.  Putting that old Bible away and using a new one.  This one is even a new translation, y'all!  This NIV-born-and-bred girl is tripping on two left feet through the New Living Translation. 

But the timing feels just right.  I am thirty-three-and-a-half, after all.  The passages I have already underlined in my new Bible didn't catch a star in the old one.  My faith, while most definitely not fully matured, has made it through the wobbly years and feels good in its skin. 

It did take me a few days to warm up to the new Bible, the one I didn't ask for, but it wasn't long before a gentle Voice spoke:

For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland. (Isaiah 43:19) (In the N. L. T.)

 

OASIS: Thoughts from my husband

Once upon a time, very nearly fifteen years ago, an ISTJ boy met an ENFP girl and as they often do, opposites attracted.  For twelve and a half years, they've worked to find harmony and middle ground.

For the first time in five years, today the boy speaks:

For my wife, the great advocate, whom I dearly love

Allow me to begin by saying a big thank you to all of the regulars here at Sorta Crunchy.  I thank you for the joy and companionship that you provide for my wife, Megan, and I also thank you for humoring me by reading the thoughts that I have been asked to share.

For the past 5 years, my dearly beloved wife has been on a journey that has ventured, ever so gently, into the world of crunchydom.  As she is a good and loving wife, she has been patient with me, waiting for me to follow of my own free will, and not starving me to death by means of granola. 

 

Among the many reasons for which I do love Megan is the fact that when she finds a truth in which she believes, she pursues it with a tremendous passion.  Over the years and because we are united as one, together we have pursued many wonderful things.  Most of these were or are things that I never would have explored on my own but after having participated, found that I did quite like them and enjoy the enrichment that they brought to our life.

You regular readers likely know my wife quite well.  To give you an idea of what makes me tick and, in turn, better understand both her and our most recent journey, I will give you a brief background and description of me, Mr. Megan.

I like order.  More accurately put, I desire, crave, and need order in my life.  When things are in disarray, dirty, or unkempt, it truly disturbs me right down to my bones and prevents me from being able to truly relax.  This is most troubling when it is my stuff or my family’s stuff that has fallen into this state.  Unorganized people and psychiatrists have created many labels for people like me, none of which are flattering, but I think they have simply done so because they are jealous of our organization skills (joking, of course).  On to the point …

Megan and I have been visiting for the better part of 6 months about a like desire to simplify our life and, more specifically, our home.  We are unashamedly professing believers in Jesus Christ, and in concert with our beliefs and some recent convictions, we have come to realize that our home can and should be a tremendous tool to be used for developing relationships with those around us and showing them by example what a Christ-filled life is all about.  As a result of this, we’ve tried many times over the past months to make our home available for fellowship with others and each time we’ve exhausted ourselves getting ready for such events because our home is puking with STUFF. 

(If you are turned off by the “Christian scene,” don’t tune me out just yet because the true theme behind what I’m sharing here is something that I do believe has the potential to be beneficial to everyone.  You will have to endure my point of view and possibly a scripture reference or two, but do your best to save judgment until you’ve read the post in its entirety.)

To shift gears slightly and provide the final background of this story, at Christmas this year, my father and mother built a kitchen island for our family.  It is a gorgeous piece of very large furniture.  While providing some much needed space for meal prep, it also doubles as our kitchen table with seating for six:


Christmas plans this year caused me to arrive back at our home, island in tow, about 4 days in advance of my wife and children.  After having hauled in this great new addition to our home (with the help of a friend who had no idea what he was getting himself into because it was so monstrously heavy), I had a very unsettled feeling within because this wonderful new toy just felt wrong in a kitchen that we had allowed to become very cluttered and not altogether clean.  A remnant of a bible verse began bouncing around in my head, very much like when you get a song stuck in your head.  Not being able to fully remember the verse or the context, I fired up the computer and found the following:

Luke 19:17 - “‘Well done!’ the king exclaimed. ‘You are a good servant. You have been faithful with the little I entrusted to you, so you will be governor of ten cities as your reward.’

 Matthew 25:21 - “The master was full of praise. ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!

Luke 16:10-12 - “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities. 11 And if you are untrustworthy about worldly wealth, who will trust you with the true riches of heaven? 12 And if you are not faithful with other people’s things, why should you be trusted with things of your own?

At this time, it dawned on me what a poor job we had done in our lives of being faithful with a little.  Further, not being grateful or satisfied with the little that God had provided for us early in our married lives, we did the American thing and ran out, credit cards in hand, to purchase much.  We spent money that we did not have to buy lots of STUFF that we really didn’t need, and as a result, we never learned how to be faithful with a little.  More simply stated, during the brief time in which we had a little, we didn’t learn how to take care of it.  When we forcibly entered into the place of having much, the task of taking care of it all was overwhelming.

I had such a searing conviction in this matter that I absolutely could not live another minute as we had been living.  Over the course of the next 3 days, I became the grim reaper of the kitchen, harvesting the souls of clutter from every cabinet, drawer, shelf, and corner.  It was probably a good thing that she was out of town or we may very well have ended up on the next episode of COPS and I don’t own the obligatory stained tank top that the men involved in domestic disputes are required to wear for this television appearance.

To give you a true and accurate read of what I was dealing with, I’ll provide a short list of examples:  (Please don’t interpret this as me pointing the finger at anyone.  My wife and I are a team and we share responsibility in victory and in loss, in pride and in shame.)

-         In 2007 we purchased 12 placesettings of pottery.  I struggled to find two complete place settings that remained unblemished.

-         We are the family that collects cups and glasses, yet we didn’t have a complete set of any style.

-         We had spare parts from 3 different sets of measuring cups and spoons.  Of course, all are different colors.

-         Mysteriously, I think we’ve kept every pickle and jelly jar that has ever graced our kitchen, though the lids have apparently shrunk as no jar had a mate.  (Ed. note: I take full responsibility for the glass jar menagerie.)

-         We had appliances that did not work, as well as a couple that we received as wedding presents and were still in their original packaging.

There was much, much more.  In my wife’s absence, I took several days off of work to completely revamp the visible surfaces of the kitchen and ½ of the cabinets and drawers.  I washed all surviving dishes and scrubbed all surfaces, literally spending about six hours on hands and knees working on the floor.  I purchased new shelf liner, new dishes, new silverware, new glasses, and other things too numerous to remember and list.

Megan and I each bring two very unique halves to our marriage.  Without her, I would live a very sterile, boring, and utilitarian life.  With each of the purchases that I made, and I spent hours at the store in deliberation, I exercised the strengths that I bring into our partnership.  I applied logic and I absolutely demanded quality from each item before it gained the privilege of entering into our “new” kitchen. 

My theme and goal was to provide a minimalist yet complete kitchen setup of quality items that can stand up to the use and abuse of family life for the next 20+ years.  I wanted nice but not showy and classy but not trendy.  I wanted something that we could be proud of without making someone with less feel self-conscious.  I wanted something that we would WANT to take good care of.  While I did have to spend more than I anticipated to accomplish this, I will say that this goal is very achievable without breaking the bank.

On the day prior to my wife’s return, I opted to inform my wife of what I’d been up to.  In retrospect, this was an excellent decision.  Had she walked in on this upgrade unsuspecting, we likely would have needed some professional intervention.  Even with the warning, however, re-entry was a bit rocky.  In Megan’s defense, I was likely somewhat less than wonderful in my forceful invitation for her to join me in my newfound zeal.  Within 24 hours, however, she had mostly recovered from shock and was on board.

Over the course of the next week, we filled the alley trashcans several more times and can proudly say that our kitchen is now complete.  We’ve moved on to the laundry room and provided that the trashmen don’t go on strike, we have plans to complete our entire home.

We’ve learned some valuable lessons as we’ve gone (and will surely learn many more).  A couple of things that I think are worth sharing:

1. We have found that order invites order and clutter begets clutter.  When you leave a tabletop clean and with nothing on it, it is likely to stay that way.  If you leave one item on the table, it quickly becomes two and then three and so on.

2. When your counters and floors are free of clutter, it becomes very easy to quickly wipe a surface down and keep it clean.

3. Quality does not necessarily equate to fancy or expensive.

4. It is actually enjoyable to do the dishes together.  You tend to engage in some very good conversation that likely wouldn’t occur if you were sitting in front of the TV.

5. A clean and orderly mood inspires a true sense of well-being and inner peace.  We’ve caught ourselves standing in the kitchen for no apparent reason and simply smiling.

6. When your home is simple, it is simple to keep it clean.  You can then invite people over without prior planning (cleaning).

 7. From the husband’s perspective:  When I see my wife taking care of the things that we’ve spent our hard-earned money on, it pleases me.  Her taking good care of things that I’ve provided makes me want to give her more.  I find this interesting because according to scripture, this is the same way that God feels.

Thank you again for spending your time today reading what I have to say.  At this point, you may wish you hadn’t.  I do sincerely hope, however, that some of you may read this and be motivated.  Maybe next time you open the freezer, or the cabinet, or the closet and something falls on your head, you’ll think of this writer’s passion for the cause of clutter-free living and follow suit.

Kyle is a former football coach who now coaches people in the realm of finance and investments.  When he isn't taming the bears and battling the bulls of the market, he spends his free time playing Superman for his wife and two daughters who adore him.  If you twist his arm hard enough, he will reveal that he is quite the writer.  He is considering dethroning Peter Walsh as reigning king of brutal decluttering.

(Ed. note -- yes, I wrote that for Kyle)

SortaCrunchy Q&A - Soul Mates

As I've mentioned, we are preparing for All Hail Princess Aliza's 3rd Birthday party tomorrow.  I am fresh out of creativity, so I am once again returning to your wonderfully thought-provoking questions from last January for writing inspiration.

My long-time dear friend Laura (aka Hollywood Housewife) asked:

do you believe in a soul-mate? do you believe in love at first sight?
i love your darling husband, so this is not to take any aim at him, of course.
it's just that i was recently asked this question and it forced me to think about what my REAL answer was, not just the stock one. 

I've really had to think about this one.

Do I believe in soul mates?

Hmmmmm.  Have I ever told you this story?

Kyle and I met and started dating in February of my freshman year of college.  One of my sorority sisters - Christy - was dating a guy who lived across the hall from Kyle.  She had been telling me for months that she thought I needed to meet him, that I would like him, that we had so much in common, yada yada.  We finally ended up meeting one another at a Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting on campus (though I must clarify - I was not, nor had I ever been, an athlete.  Why was I there?  I'm sure cute boys factored into the equation) and I decided I wanted to ask him to the upcoming Chi Omega Valentine's Day party. 

(The theme was Chi Os in Cuffs.) 

(Please don't tell my mother.) 

So Christy decided the four of us should go on a double date before the party so Kyle and I could get to know one another.  Kyle called me one afternoon to officially ask me to go on this double date, and though it was the first time we had ever really talked, we were on the phone for over an hour.

I went into my suitemate's room and said, "I think I'm gonna marry that boy."

And a little over two years later, I did exactly that.

Returning to Laura's question - do I believe in love at first sight?  I certainly fell hard and fast in like with Kyle from the beginning.  I honestly don't think I can say I believe in love at first sight.  To me, love is something so rich in depth and knowledge and experience and history . . . I just don't think that love happens instantly.  Absolutely attraction, chemistry, infatuation - all of those things can be instantaneous, but love . . . Personally, I don't think so.

Soul mates?

When Kyle and I were in college, a very popular gift for girls to create for someone important in their lives (best friends, sorority Big and Lil sisters, boyfriends, etc) were these lapboards.  We collaged pictures and magazine cut-outs and mementos onto the board, shellacked it all with Modge Podge, then sealed the whole thing with Liquid Glass.  I made one for Kyle to commemorate our one year anniversary:

Be gentle with our fashion and hairstyle choices.  It was the mid-90s, after all.

When I snapped this picture this morning, I noticed that right there between the picture of us at Chi Os in Cuffs and us in front of Niagara Falls, there were the words

yep, soul mate.

So evidently as a dreamy-eyed sophomore in college, I believed in soul mates.

I'm preparing to dodge some flying tomatoes for this, but I have to confess that now I'm not so sure.

Our trusty friend Wikipedia says a soul mate is "a person with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, and/or compatibility."  Okay yes, yes.  I can dig that. 

But it goes on to suggest a "related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul – which is thought to be the ultimate soulmate, the one and only other half of one's soul, for which all souls are driven to find and join."  This is where I get a little squirmy. 

For one thing, only weeks before I met Kyle I had sworn off boys and dating and all of that heartache altogether.  I most certainly didn't feel driven to find and join his soul.  That all feels a little bit mystic, even for me.  And mostly, I just feel like that is a huge responsibility to burden someone with.  I think if Kyle thought he was the one and only other half of my soul, he might want to run away a little bit.  And I think I wouldn't blame him.

The reason this is hard for me is because when I hear the phrase "soul mate," I think of someone with whom there is such compelling commonality, such sameness, such intense shared outlook on everything in life . . . and I don't think I want that.  I think it would be hard to be married to, to be in it for the entirety of life, someone whose soul is exactly like mine.  I think that would grow boring or irritating after awhile.

Pardon the trite for just a moment, but Kyle and I are much more yin and yang. 

Where I am emotional and will spin out on anything at any given moment, he is logical and is able to calmly reel me back in.  The thought of confrontation makes me burst into tears, and I secretly think he enjoys it.  He uses his Coach Voice while I try to whisper.  I never watch the news (ever) and he reads it several times a day on his phone.  In fact, he adores his iPhone, and I am avoiding one at all cost.  He is solidly conservative while I lean way into the progressive.  My glasses are almost always rose-colored, but he views life through the lens of reality. 

But somehow, it all balances out.  And he knows me like no one else.  And I know him.  We can absolutely finish each other sentences, even if that means making statements that would never come out of our own mouths.  And we appreciate the differences.  And learn from them, too.  He has helped me come to appreciate boxing while (and don't you dare tell a soul I told you this) he can call the judge's decision on Project Runway with far more accuracy than I can.

I don't know if I would say we are soul mates simply because I'm not totally on board with the concept.  I do know this - we are really, really good together.  And we are really, really good for each other.  And I am really, really, really thankful that I went trolling for cute boys that night at FCA. 

So.

What do you think?  Do you believe in soul mates?  Love at first sight?  Any other lovey-dovey gushy thoughts you want to share this weekend?

 

His Favorite Chocolate Cake

 

My man has simple tastes.  Luckily for me, he doesn't request Giada's Chocolate-Strawberry Panini or Nigella's Caramel Croissant Pudding when I ask him what he might like for me to make for him for Father's Day.

Just a simple chocolate cake will do.  

His mother's is the best either of us have ever come across, and I am happy to share the recipe with you.

Behold, the Twenty Minute Cake:

1 cup butter
4 Tblsp. dry cocoa
1 cup water
In microwave melt butter for 20 or 30 seconds, then add cocoa and water. Heat together in microwave until it begins to boil.

2 cups sugar
2 cups flour
Add sugar and flour and beat well with mixer.

1/2 cup buttermilk
1 tsp. baking soda
2 beaten eggs
1 tsp. Mexican vanilla
Add last four ingredients and stir well with mixer.

Pour into sprayed baking pan. (9 x 13)    Bake 20 minutes at 425 degrees. (some ovens, only 400 degrees)    While cake is baking, make the frosting below:

FROSTING

1/2 cup butter
3 to 4 Tblsp. cocoa
1 tsp. Mexican vanilla
1/2 box powdered sugar

Melt margarine in microwave and add rest of ingredients. Beat well.  Spread on cake just as soon as it's out of the oven. Cover with foil immediately.   (The original frosting recipe is double this, but it is just too much frosting for us.)

OR

This is another favorite that she likes to use on the cake sometimes instead of frosting:

CHOCOLATE GLAZE

2 Tblsp. butter (melted)
2 Tblsp. cocoa
1 tsp. vanilla
1 cup powdered sugar
1/4 cup or less heavy cream

Commence with celebrating!

Oh, and speaking of food . . . the winner of the Real Food on a Real Budget giveaway is Erin (comment #118) who said:

I would love to get this book! Eating good, organic food is sometimes expensive (especially in California) but I'd love some baby steps on how to eat healthier on a budget! :)

If you didn't win but would like to purchase a book, I encourage you to go see Stephanie to purchase a copy (the e-book is on sale right for $18.97!)

Remember this? Sizzlin' Summer Recipes: Best. Burgers. Ever.

Back in May 2008, Dacey was newly out of diapers, AJ wasn't crawling yet, and we were still Texans.  Some things haven't changed in those two years though, and tonight we will (of course) be grilling burgers for dinner.  I thought I would take a moment to re-run this post from May 15, 2008, to share our favorite way to fix up some hamburgers.  Please note - we haven't found a great source of ground brisket here, so now we just use plain old ground beef.  Kyle's standard mix-in is now Head Country Hot BBQ Sauce and grape jelly.

Happy Memorial Day and happy eating!

Alright, ya'll.  My gorgeously named sweet friend Megan of Fried Okra opened up her recipe files and commenced with revving up our taste buds with her top ten sizzlin' spring and summer recipes.  (That creamy linguine with zucchini?  Yum-O!)  She has invited us to share our best o' the best, and I am only happy to oblige.

Spring and summer offers us the perfect time to fire up that backyard grill, and that is a double blessing for this mama in that 1) grilling keeps the heat outside where it belongs and 2) my man is all-too-happy to work his grilling wonders on that shiny monument to manly cooking.  He really is quite the grill master, and his repertoire ranges from perfectly cooked steaks to deliciously grilled bananas and all manner of fare in between.

One of his specialties that we eat pretty much year 'round are hamburgers.  Of course, this is a staple in backyard cuisine, but we were unsatisfied with just your average ground beef patty seasoned with a little salt and pepper.  Rather than inventing new and unique ways to dress the grilled burger, my husband went a'hunting for a new and unique way to create the perfect patty. 

A little digging led him to two schools of thought: be creative in the meats used in the patty or be creative in the seasonings you add in.  It's no surprise that, as Texans, we take a more-is-more approach to dining, so we decided to combine the two schools of thought.  The result - best burger ever!

Here's what we do:

1) Start with a pound of ground beef.  Now, pick another kind of meat to add to the mix.  We originally were going to add a pound of ground veal to ours, but our small town grocer doesn't keep ground veal in stock (go figure), so the butcher suggested we might try ground brisket.  The result was pure burger perfection for us, but you might play around a little to find the taste, texture, and flavor combination you like best.  Ground bison, perhaps?

2) So work your two pounds of meat together and prepare to add your seasonings.  Sure, you could go with basic salt and pepper, but why stop there?  I'll tell you our favorite way to season - add equal parts barbecue sauce and brown mustard.  Add just a bit at a time, you don't want to overwhelm the meat and end up with raw hamburger mush.  We've also used equal parts soy sauce and lime juice with great success.  We've been known to add grape jelly in after we salt and pepper (you won't believe how smashing the result is), and once we even added in some leftover bean and bacon soup.  Now, if you do find your meat mixture is getting too moist, you'll want to crumble a piece of bread (plain old white bread works fine) to sop up some of the juiciness.  You want moist burgers, but too much moisture and those burgers will fall apart on our grill. 

Pop those beauties on the grill, and you've got yourself some sizzlin' summer perfection!

You may find with such flavorful burger patties, you can dress them as minimally as you like so you can really appreciate the taste of the meat.  We usually just have potato salad or chips on the side.  Can't go wrong with a big pitcher of Texas sweet tea, but if you use our recipe, keep your toothbrush handy for efficient cavity prevention.

Make sure you head back to Megan's place to drool over all her recipes and see what everyone else has to offer up today!

(burger photo by (nutmeg) )

 

SortaCrunchy Q&A - Texas. More babies. Mama time.

Photo by Schluesselbeinin2007

Back in January, I asked for some questions to spur me onward, and y'all showed up with some amazing inquiries.  I want to honor that by actually answering them, so I'm going to take that on over the next week or so. 

Here we go!

* * * * *

My sweet friend Amanda asked me:

Can you envision anything bringing you back to Texas? Please? Soon? ♥

A few nights ago, I dreamt we were moving back to San Marcos.  I woke up ensconced in warmth and dreamy joy.  When I became fully aware that it was just a dream, I cried.  For real.  I miss Texas so much.  A year ago today, I wrote a little list of all the things I miss about it.

Can I see us moving back there?  Kyle and I plan to retire somewhere in the Valley.  Prior to that?  Only if God's tender mercy and sovereign will allows for it.  My growing up years were spent here in Oklahoma, but The Republic will probably always feel like home to me.

sniff sniff Moving on . . .

* * * * *

Now, let's see, Amanda (different Amanda from above), Sheila, Stephanie, and Lisa all wanted to know about our plans for more children.

I mentioned in the NFP post that we are currently avoiding trying to get pregnant. 

Will we ever have another?

Oh, this question is so complicated for me.  Let me attempt to break it down:

• On the one hand, I always dreamed I would have at least three kids.  On the other hand, I never dreamed I would have had two Cesarean births.

• The possibility of being able to try for a VBA2C in Oklahoma looks pretty slim.  C-sections are major surgeries with inherent risk.  Honestly?  I am scared to have another one.

• I'm very, very happy and content with our two beautiful, lovely girls.
• But I do love babies and children and I am having a hard time picturing our family as totally complete.
• Kyle doesn't feel like we are done either.
  

I would guess, at some point, we'll try for at least one more. 

I do need a gracious, loving scripted response to the "are you going to try for a boy?" question.  I don't mind a bit when people ask if we are going to have more kids.  But what am I supposed to do with the gender question here?  It's not like we get to choose. 

(Oh, you can have your Shettles Method.  We tried that with AJ and she is evidence of God's jovial response to our attempt to control the matter.)

I could really spin out on this, but my friend Robin at Not Ever Still Life already voiced her opinion on the question, so I'll defer to her passionate and eloquent response.  (Robin is, by the way, currently babymooning with her itty-bitty brand new little boy.)

Annnnnnnnnnnnd, moving on.

* * * * *

My sweet, sweet friend Corey asked: What is something you do JUST FOR YOURSELF? Something that puts YOU first?

For about five years, the thing that I have done that is just for myself is this: Enforce an early bedtime for our children.

Now, I know, I know.  Some of you may think that we AP-ers just let our kids run all over the place until all hours of the night when they crash out on the floor.  I can't tell you what other families do, but that is not what we do.

I read a lot - a lot - of material on sleep back in The Dark Days.  One positive and healthy thing I came away with is how early bedtimes are good for babies and little ones.  My babies were usually in bed for the night by 6:30 or 7:00.  Dacey is now five and AJ is two and a half and we still have a fairly strict lights-out by 8:00 rule.  They usually talk, play, and sing for awhile (sometimes an hour longer) in their beds, but they are in their beds by 8:00.

So maybe this isn't just for me.  I believe it is good for them.  But it's really, REALLY good for me. 

Those hours from eight o'clock until I crash out on the floor (kidding) are my Off-Duty time.  I read, watch TV, return telephone calls, play on the computer, watch movies with Kyle . . . whatever I feel like doing.  I guard my evening downtime fiercely, and if I don't get it, I get very cranky.  It's the best possible thing I can do for myself in this season of life.  It's (almost) just for me.

* * * * *

That's it for today!  More tomorrow.  (Meanwhile, The 40 Days of Joy continue at Megspots.  Days 12 and 13 can be seen there.)

goodness

Thank you all for the kind words on yesterday's post. 

When I share something like that and the response includes kind words and hugs across the miles, my first instinct is to pull those words back to my chest and crinkle my eyes and say, "Oh, I'm fine.  No, really.  Fine." 

And on many levels, I am fine.  And on others, not fine.

The responses shared in comments and private emails have encouraged me to be okay with sitting in a moment of hurt while all the while acknowledging the goodness that surrounds.  In fact, that inspiration has sparked, clarified, and confirmed my focus for the coming Lenten season.  (more on that later)

Goodness in this moment:

*** my sister Emily who not only accepts my mess, but stays longer than planned to help me dig out and clean up (both literally and figuratively) (especially my laundry room which was about to pick up the phone and call the producers of Hoarders)

*** my husband who, sensing my absolute weariness after a week of tending to sick chicks, immediately began making dinner upon his arrival home last night

*** sweet girls who make me laugh even when their fevers soar (and the promise of health just around the corner!)

*** close-knit community manifested in almost daily email discussions with friends who know me

*** Mothering magazine.  It's arrival in my mailbox encourages me mightily.

*** An incredible cookbook from a mama who knows her stuff: Family Feasts for $75 a Week: A Penny-wise Mom Shares Her Recipe for Cutting Hundreds from Your Monthly Food Bill (that I purchased with my own money thankyouverymuch - but that is, of course, an affiliate link)

*** salsa verde

*** remembering sunny February days south of Austin - two years ago:

 

 

 

*** while honoring the beauty of winter on the plains:

*** Sumatra fair trade

*** A very new friend who showed up on my doorstep with dinner for our family one night this week

*** plans falling into place for a new direction I'll be taking with SortaCrunchy in the very near future

And more and more and more. 

So much goodness.

(comments closed.  Have a beautiful Friday!)